| Site with pet humor www.Petsplace.co.za Jokes & quotes about dogs & cats
Ever wonder what pets are doing while their owners are at work or school?" Funny Pet Cartoons Kids n Friends The photographer did a great job of matching up the kids and dogs. This is adorable!! Get Fuzzy Cartoons |
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Ten Pet Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans
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| The Dog Park Song by TCady (sing to the tune: Take Me Out to the Ball Game) Take me out to the dog park, I can't wait to be free. Pick up my presents with your little sack. I must get muddy before we go back. Let me play, play, play for the whole day, If we have to go home it's a shame, For its one, two, three balls to chase - At the new dog park! |
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| A DAY WITHOUT LAUGHTER IS A DAY WASTED!!!
A man was flying from Seattle to San Francisco. Unexpectedly, the plane was diverted to Sacramento along the way. The flight attendant explained that there would be a delay, and if the passengers wanted to get off the aircraft the plane would re-board in 50 minutes. Everybody got off the plane except one lady who was blind. The man had noticed her as he walked by and could tell the lady was blind because her Seeing Eye dog lay quietly underneath the seats in front of her throughout the entire flight. He could also tell she had flown this very flight before because the pilot approached her, and calling her by name, said, "Kathy, we are in Sacramento for almost an hour. Would you like to get off and stretch your legs?" The blind lady replied, "No thanks, but maybe my dog would like to stretch his legs." Picture this: All the people in the gate area came to a complete standstill when they looked up and saw the pilot walk off the plane with a Seeing Eye dog! The pilot was even wearing sunglasses. People scattered. They not only tried to change planes, but they were trying to change airlines! Remember... THINGS AREN'T ALWAYS AS THEY APPEAR. |
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Dog pack attacks gator in FloridaAt times nature can be cruel, but there is also a raw beauty, and even a certain justice manifested within that cruelty. The alligator, one of the oldest and ultimate predators, normally considered the "apex predator" in it's natural ecosystem, can still fall victim to implemented 'team work' strategy, made possible due to the tight knit social structure and "survival of the fittest pack mentality" bred into the canines over the last several hundred thousands of years by natural selection. See the attached remarkable photograph courtesy of Nature Magazine. Note that the Alpha dog has a muzzle hold on the gator preventing it from breathing, while another dog has a hold on the tail to keep it from thrashing. The third dog attacks the soft under belly of the gator. Not for the squeamish! Click to see picture |
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| If what is inside a fire hydrant is H2O... Then what's on the outside of a fire hydrant???? K9P (Ca-nine pee!) |
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Letter to PetsTo be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.Dear Dogs and Cats, The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest. The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run. (I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm. For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required. The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough! |
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| To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our
front door:
To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:
Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
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Dog Rules for Christmas
Have a great Christmas! |
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New breeds now recognized by the AKC ..
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Top 20 Reason Why Dogs Don't Use Computers20) Can't stick their heads out of Windows '95.19) Fetch command not available on all platforms. 18) Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side. 17) Too difficult to "mark" every web site they visit. 16) Can't help attacking the screen when they hear "You've Got Mail." 15) Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating. 14) Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they're browsing www.pethouse.com instead of working. 13) Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG Frisbee. 12) Not at all fooled by Chuck wagon Screen Saver. 11) Still trying to come up with an "emoticon" that signifies tail-wagging. 10) Waiting for the introduction of the Microsoft Opposable Thumb. 9) Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome 8) 'Cause dogs aren't GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand... 7) Barking in next cube keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software. 6) SmellU-SmellMe still in beta test. 5) SIT and STAY were hard enough, GREP and AWK are out of the question! 4) Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to maneuver. 3) Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.master's.leg. 2) Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms. 1) TrO{ HyAqR4tDc TgrOo TgYPmE WeIjTyH P;AzWqS,. |
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Purina dietI have a Golden retriever. I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog? (DUH!)On impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story). Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish setter's butt and a car hit us both. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard! |
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| Are you sick of people looking at your breed of dog in fear because
politicians and the media are saying things like;
"We want to breed these dogs out of existence," "They are killing machines on a leash." "These breeds don't belong in our community" Well worry no longer, AttackChi will be making disguises for all the so called 'dangerous breeds'. Now you can go to the park with your kids and your dog (like you have been doing for years), without the worry of people thinking you are a bad parent. |
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